Five things to accept when two of your close friends start dating

(I typed “…of your friends go out” but I wasn’t sure so I sought the help of Google and the number of results about what to do when that happens amazed me. But this is about ‘accepting’ so no rants)

1. Off limits. Accept the fact that “dates” are off limits to friends. Yes, all of you can still get together just like before but there are times that would be specially reserved for the two of them. There are ‘hangouts’  meant for barkadas like the Karaoke and there are those meant for lovers like the movies. This is pretty much self explanatory so.

2. Two to tango. Accept the fact that 99 percent of the time, the two of them are either present or absent. They might, I repeat, might, be consulting with each other first before replying to your SMS invite with a yes or a no. Besides, it also feels wrong if the partner is nil. The present one would have to answer the question “where is…why is…” a couple of times. In Katy Perry’s words, “Never one without the other“.

3. Secret? What secret? Accept the fact that telling one is as good as telling the other. And this is based on experience (which made my eyes puff for two days) so your argument is invalid! hehe. Be on guard in the presence of a ‘half’ especially if the one you intend to talk shit about is the partner. HAHA. No, seriously, seemingly harmless remarks turn into something big.

4. Affected. Accept the fact that the group would be affected, one way or another. No matter how many times you have the pre-relationship talk (do-not-involve-us-in-your-LQs-okay-we-are-all-friends-here), it will happen. Tension at times would be very palpable especially if the lovebirds are obviously not in speaking terms. A few years ago, a friend became distant to our group after she and another friend broke up it’s sad but it happened. I read somewhere that in cases like these, the one who was hurt more during the break up gets custody of thei ‘common friends’. Sounds fair for the couple, unfair for the friends in question.

5. No choice. As an ‘understanding’ friend, you are expected to understand the situation so better get into terms with your attachment issues and move on. There are seven billion people in the world to meet  and though going through the gettingtoknowyou part with a stranger is quite taxing, think of the infinite possibilities that starts with ‘hello’. It really sucks when you lose two friends to each other but ‘losing’ them is only one of the many possible outcomes. Bottom line is, the choice is yours. If they’re worth sticking around with, why not?

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